What is the Gen Z stare? TikTok zoomers and millennials are bickering over facial expressions

TikTok loves to argue — and the latest spat is over the so-called Gen Z stare.

You might have a few questions like: 1) what’s the Gen Z stare? and 2) why is TikTok fighting over this? and 3) who would spend their time fighting over this? Well, we’ll get into all that.

But first, the primary question.

What is the Gen Z stare?

Well, the full answer depends on who you ask. But the agreed upon facts are that it’s a blank, middle-distance stare into the void often employed by Gen Z folks. (By the way, definitions vary, but, roughly speaking, Gen Z spans those born between 1997-2012.) From someone else’s perspective, it’s a young person staring into nowhere as you attempt to communicate with them.

We cannot, however, go much further without getting into the bickering.

What is the Gen Z stare trend on TikTok and why are people arguing about it?

First things first, most people online are not arguing over the existence of the Gen Z stare, but rather how and why it’s deployed. And, another disclaimer, no generation is a monolith and no opinion or behavior is fully shared among any large swath of humans. We are complicated, silly, hypocritical, intelligent creatures who are able to hold both multiple truths and misbeliefs at once. Have you ever seen Werner Herzog wax poetic about skateboarding? The human condition is unpredictable.

Anyway, I’m generalizing, but Gen Z seems to think boomers, Gen Xers, and millennials — the cringe millennial especially — are the cause of Gen Z stare and the source of a misunderstanding about it. In this version of the Gen Z stare, the younger person is working a customer service job, and the stare is simply a reaction to a customer of an older generation doing something dumb or annoying. The Gen Z person then stares in disbelief or frustration. That’s the thrust of the definition at online dictionary Know Your Meme, for instance. Here’s a TikTok skit, for example, claiming the stare is for something like a boomer not understanding when to remove their credit card from a payment machine.

Or, another example, where someone might not understanding a basic fact — that a class is fully booked — leads to the stare.

Now, the arguing comes in because other folks have said that this definition of the Gen Z stare is incorrect. After all, plenty of people of all generations working customer service jobs have stared into the void when faced with a particularly incomprehensible customer. Instead, the argument goes, the Gen Z stare isn’t necessarily about working a customer service job at all. It’s more referencing folks’ unwillingness or inability to participate in pleasantries or benign informational exchanges.

This version of the Gen Z stare refers to any situation where a young person gets approached about something simple (i.e., a basic question or a friendly “hello”) and stares straight ahead instead of responding. In fact, millennials and others working service jobs have said they’ve gotten the stare from Gen Z customers. Here’s @theprincessandthepoppers breaking it down (gently) for zoomers as a service worker who’s seen the stare when asking customers where they’d like to sit in a restaurant.

And here’s another skit addressing a similar scenario.

So why the bickering? Well, because zoomers have pushed back on the idea they might have a slightly weird habit. Meanwhile, millennials have retorted that the generation responsible for mercilessly roasting millennial behavior should be able to acknowledge their own occasional cringe behavior.

This @xiandivyne post pokes fun at Gen Z for getting defensive, basically saying they’re claiming, “we’re smart and you’re stupid.”

Or here’s even a zoomer talking about experiencing the stare at work.

Now, to be fair to zoomers, a few weeks ago there were a few posts — and a write-up from the New York Post, naturally — complaining about the Gen Z “gaze” from service workers. That’s seemingly related to the “stare” debate now, but it’s certainly evolved.

So… why is this a thing?

Part of the reason this trend — or debate — has been embraced with such energy is the fact that it is slightly poking fun at Gen Z. Zoomers are young and, naturally, have a habit of roasting other generations — especially millennials because, to them, millennials are cringe. Millennial cringe compilations are literally a whole genre of video and, as a millennial, I can admit that’s not without a good bit of merit. But some zoomers have seemingly not liked the fact that anyone would poke fun at their behavior, which has led to the Gen Z stare pushback and even more bickering online.

I can’t say for sure, but maybe the Gen Z stare is real. As some folks have floated online, small talk would be difficult for a generation that came of age during COVID isolation. Gen Z roasted millennials for the Millennial Pause — the habit of waiting a beat before talking during a recording — so maybe zoomers have the same issue, but IRL instead of on their phone.

But the real reason this is a trend, or an argument, is because it’s become fertile ground for zoomers to get defensive and (mostly) millennials to poke fun or gently point out something about Gen Z. In total, it seems to be a pretty laid back argument — nobody’s actually getting pissed off — but it does seem to be growing in vigor lately.

But as a millennial, I’d rather try to bridge the gap with zoomers with something we can all agree on: at least we’re not boomers.